By Twinkle Raheja, Program Coordinator and Parent of a Sophomore
Office of Student Success Services (OS3)
Your student will soon be returning home for the summer. They are not the same person they were when you dropped them off at SMCM last August! How can you reconnect with them and have a pleasant summer living under the same roof with this newly emerging adult?
Advice
- Help your student keep a routine that is very close to what they have at SMCM
- Compromise-Meet in the middle with certain expectations – for both
- Beware, your student’s dislikes and likes might have changed
- Give your student space because they have been independent for months
- It is your house and your rules, within reason, of course
- They are an emerging adult who is back under your roof, so treat them as an adult and not as a kid
- They miss the friends they made outside away from college, so let them hang out with their friends
- Encourage them to keep busy and active; working a summer job is good (also, a job during Winter Break is good too!)
- Involve them in any family decision plans; Leave room for options.
- For example, visiting Aunt Grace or going to Grandma’s house
- Don’t get upset if they say they want to go home (SMCM) or miss their friends or significant other.
Quality Time
- Have meals together when possible
- Find something to do together that is fun- Some examples are:
- cooking class, wine and design session, grocery shopping for a family favorite meal, or grocery shopping in general, family movie nights
- Go to the library and pick out some books to read
- Game and puzzle nights
- Do chores together
- Quality Time in the Kitchen
- Make your own pizza, bake cookies, taco night, stuff your potato night
- This is your opportunity to talk to your child about next semester, their major, and plans for the future. These kinds of conversations are often easier to have in the car (where you’re sitting side-by-side rather than facing each other)
- Go on a day trip together -sightseeing, museums, skiing, ice skating, do some window shopping, and go to your favorite restaurant.
- Enjoy self-care with your student: hiking, biking, walking, spa treatments at home, mani pedi, sports events, yoga or pilates classes.
Joanne Goldwater, the SMCM Seahawk Family Liaison, shared a funny story. When her son, Brandon, was a student at SMCM, he approached his father and Joanne a few weeks before returning to the College for his sophomore year. He said to them, “You know that I love you guys a lot. Please don’t take this the wrong way, but I’m really looking forward to going back to school.” Joanne and her husband looked at each other and said to Brandon, “You know that we love you very much. Please don’t take this the wrong way, but we’re looking forward to you going back to school, too!” Win-Win!
Wishing you and your student a very good end to the spring semester and a very pleasant summer break!